Division

Division.

Not the arithmetic operation that may or may not be taught next week (depending on which argument you currently believe) – rather the process of being separated. As the weeks have gone by it appears that more and more people who tried to refrain from choosing a side have made their decision.  And even though it didn’t include an ESPN special done in poor taste, the result is the same: bitterness.

I believe that we are better when we are united than when we are divided. A group working toward a common goal will reach it faster, and more pleasantly, than a group at odds with each other (thank you “Survivor” for that lesson).

We are a community. We live here. We work here. Generally speaking, we all want the same things for ourselves and our families. Do we want to get along with our neighbors, our classmates, our teachers, our bosses, our co-workers, and our families?  I think most do.

Well, if you want our community to be a certain way, then BE that way yourself (cue Michael Jackson “Man in the Mirror”). We must first hold ourselves to the standard that we want to be surrounded with.

So if you’re commenting on the internet– that means you.

If you’re sitting in, outside of, or around a board meeting – that means you.

If you’re in a classroom as a teacher or as a student – that means you.

If you’re making phone calls or writing letters to the editor, the union or board members – that means you.

If you’re standing on a picket line or other protest – that means you.

If you’re driving by a picket line or other protest – that means you.

I don’t advocate participating or not participating in any of those activities, I am just imploring you to behave the way that you would like yourself, your family, your profession and our community reflected.  I understand that emotions run high when our livelihood and our children are involved; and I’m certainly not saying that I’m perfect, but let’s all try harder.

If you expect to be a respected professional, then conduct yourself at all times and in all places in a respectful and professional manner. If you expect honesty and transparency from the union and board during negotiations, then stop hiding behind fake names when posting on the internet. I believe the discourse would be much more civil if everyone had to stand by the words coming out of their mouths (or typed by their fingers) and by the actions that they are taking.

I encourage us to hold each other accountable. If someone is saying or doing something that is out of line – do not offer your approval. We all make mistakes; help them get back on track. But certainly don’t join in and use their behavior as an excuse for yours. Hold yourself to a standard that you can be proud of, and support that behavior from those around you too.  I’m not suggesting that we won’t still have disagreements, but let’s look at how we are handling them and decide if it’s reasonable and noble - if it's how we want to teach our children to settle their differences.

In the area of accountability, educators who have used scare tactics on our innocent and helpless children must be disciplined for their actions. I have heard many shocking and heartbreaking stories of teachers using students as pawns in these negotiations and this, I believe, is what has caused the deepest outrage. Educators must have no tolerance for such behavior and change this culture from within. I also urge parents to find it in their hearts to forgive and use such examples as an opportunity to show their children how we expect them to conduct themselves. We are still protecting our children by demanding consequences for violating the utmost trust that can be bestowed on a person – placing our children in his or her care.

Most cultures and religions teach the golden rule, telling us to treat others the way we wish to be treated. That’s a hard lesson when someone else “started it”. Instead of worrying about who started it, or who's to blame - let’s start over. Let’s all take a step back, take a deep breath, and realize that once all of this is over (and someday, somehow it will be), we will still be neighbors, teachers, parents, administrators and hopefully still friends.

We will still be a community. The question is what kind of community will that be?  What kind do you want it to be? And how will you behave to make that happen?